Not Goodbye Not Yet
by trankwility
Summary: I smiled genuinely at him and started to caress his cheek gently.  Don't be like that Cloud... I'm sure – I believe that you'll come back to me, like you always do.  [ cloudxaerith ]  [drabble no. 5: Belief ]


- drabble no. 5 ; **Belief**  
_alternate time.  
_Cloud and Aerith.

**disclaimer**: I do not own Cloud and Aerith, they belong to Square Enix.

enjoy. :)

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**Not Goodbye... Not yet.**

I stirred in my bed, releasing a quiet moan as the morning sun kissed my skin with its gentle warmth. I took in a breath and I caught a most familiar scent; a scent that drove my senses wild when I breathed in too much of it, a scent that left me craving for more. Taking in the smell again, a small smile rested itself upon my lips and I opened my eyes to see the very reason I strove to live. Cloud. His back was toward me but I could easily tell it was him, not only by his intoxicating scent, but by the way his blonde locks easily defied gravity itself and stood up in high spikes. He still hadn't noticed I was awake. Sly thoughts began to enter my mind and I closed my eyes, pretending to still be sleeping.

I let a low moan escape from my throat and took in a deep breath. " Ohh... Zack... " I whispered with a breathy voice loud enough, hopefully, to catch Cloud's attention. I succeeded. His intoxicating scent was stronger now as my nose caught the fragrance when I breathed in and I could feel his cool breath on my skin, making my mind go crazy. I knew he was looking ( or maybe glaring ) at me now, I could feel the tinge of jealousy emanating off of him, he was probably trying to figure out what Zack was doing in my dreams. I laughed at him in my mind and then let out one last moan. " Zack... I... " Before I said anything more, I grinned widely and opened my eyes to see Cloud glaring at me. " Just kidding. "

Cloud knitted his brows together in a confused manner, but I could see the relief behind it. I laughed, wrapping my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me, staring into his deep sapphire eyes. His eyes never ceased to dazzle me whenever I stared into them; they always sent my heart to go in overdrive and my knees to feel weak. I smiled at him, toothlessly, and finally noticed that he wasn't acting really cheerful this morning. His lips were trapped in a frown as his expression was clearly a sad, frustrated one. I knew what was wrong and felt my lips curve down. I released him from my hold and sat up watching as he reclined away and took a seat next to me, his gloved hand reached out to gently cup my cheek. I brought my hand up to his, holding it gently, his eyes kept themselves on me. They were so sad, I had to look away and that's when I noticed that he was fully clothed, clad in SOLDIER clothing and all. I leaned into his hand, closing my eyes and breathed in sharply.

" ...You're leaving again. " To my surprise my tone was sad, not what I wanted it to be. I opened my eyes to see him nodding sadly, and he looked away from me. " Yes. " His voice was barely audible but I could clearly hear the misery in it, it hit my heart. Hard.

I sighed and bit my lower lip. " Why? " He didn't look at me and shrugged, " I don't know..." The same tone in his voice ripped through me and panged my heart but there was something about it that made me think he was lying. I breathed in sharply and closed my eyes in sorrow. " How long will you be gone for? " It was silent for awhile. My eyes stayed closed as I desperately waited for his answer, hoping that it would be what I wanted to hear. I could hear him sigh and felt his thumb gently rub my cheek, sending unnecessary reactions to my heart. I felt his gaze on me once again but didn't open my eyes, concentrating on his voice. " I don't know yet for sure... But... I know I'll be gone for awhile... " I opened my eyes again to see his flicker away from mine. He turned his face away from me, as if he was shameful. That made me sorry.

I pulled his hand away from my cheek, it was hard to though because his thumb was still caressing my cheek but I managed to pull it away and with my free hand, I lifted his chin so that I could clearly see his face, it was still grief-stricken. I held his hand in mine and carefully intertwined our fingers and tried to fake a small smile to reassure him. I think he saw through it though because he sighed and looked away from me again, staring at our intertwined fingers.

-- Cloud was a SOLDIER, his duty was to protect the citizens of the town and make sure that the city was safe. He escorted high-class people to faraway territories of the world and delivered important items to places I've never heard of. I was proud of him because he managed to fulfill his dreams of becoming a SOLDIER but I was also sad because he had to leave many times on long trips to do his job. I missed him every time he was gone because every day he was gone was another day we didn't get to be with each other.

Usually, our goodbye's weren't as full with melancholy like today was. Usually, he knew everything and was sure of what he was going away for, but today... he seemed so unsure or, for most of the part, very sad. A kind of sadness that made me believe that this time... He wouldn't be coming back. It pained me to think that he might not be coming back but I couldn't show him that, it would only make leaving for him even harder, and I didn't want to do that to him.

He tightened the hold of our hands together and shyly looked at me, his eyes continued to dazzle even in this state of depression. I looked away and hesitated to ask. " You -... You're... coming back this time ...Right? " I didn't want to ask this, but my curiosity got the best of me. I saw his eyes widen at my question, his body tensed and lips curved up in a non-believable smile. " Of course, Aerith. " I frowned at his lie, I could easily tell the uncertainty in his voice and he sighed, again looking down in shame. " To be honest, I'm not sure if I will... "

The uncertainty he held was unusual. Usually, Cloud was very confident in himself. He was the one who had more confidence, bravery and strength than I could ever have but I held more optimism, compassion and wisdom then he ever could. Hehe... I finally decided to turn this dreary event to a more hopeful one, the sadness was too much for me now. With my free hand, I cupped Cloud's cheek, just like he had to mine, and brought his face to look at me. I smiled genuinely at him and started to caress his cheek gently.

" Don't be like that Cloud... I'm sure – I believe that you'll come back to me, like you always do. " I tried to sound as hopeful as I could for him, despite the current situation and to my surprise, it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. Maybe it was because I really _did_ believe he would come back. Of course he would. I could see a small smile toy at the corners of lip and suddenly, most of my sadness had turned into faith for him. My eyes quickly flickered to the clock that stood on the table next to our bed, it read: 7:15am. I held our hands together tightly and pulled him closer to my face, continuing to caress his cheek as I smiled again at him. " You're going to be late... " I stated with a soft whisper. Honestly... I didn't want him to leave yet, but it was true. He was going to be late and I didn't want him to lose his job from tardiness because of me, especially since he worked so hard to get in. " You should go now... Don't worry about me! " I squeezed his hand in reassurance and winked, a smile brightened his face. " I won't stray off to Zack while you're gone. I'll stay here – and I'll cheer for you – Okay, Cloud? "

He laughed, quietly but genuinely. I felt his hands slip out from our hold and carefully he grabbed my face. I stared into his eyes, getting lost in them and started to a feel a bit lightheaded as they dazzled me once again. I was so preoccupied with his blue orbs that he caught me off guard when his soft lips gently touched mine. I slid my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me until I could feel his hard chest against my own fragile one. Again, I smelt his scent, it intoxicated me. The smell of the sea and oak with a hint of sweet flowers drove me and my senses wild, I don't know why, but it did. Just as he deepened our kiss, I felt him pull away, I groaned softly, staring at him, begging for more. He smiled apologetically to me and poked my nose, grinning now.

" Sorry. But like you said, I'm going to be late. " He laughed teasingly at me as I mockingly glared at him but I couldn't help but smile after. The laughing soon stopped and in that short period of time, we shared a loving gaze only to be broken by Cloud as he grabbed my face again, placing his hands gently on the sides of my face and leaned forward, kissing my forehead softly. He pulled back and smiled that wonderful smile I always fell for and slowly stood up from the bed. " ... I guess I should go now... " His voice was sad, but it wasn't the kind of sad that pained my heart, it was the kind of sad that would make me miss him badly.

As he was about to stand up fully, I managed to grab his hand causing him to turn to face me. " Wait! " I smiled at him slyly and pulled him down, causing him to lose his balance and collapse on me. I giggled at his state and grabbed his face, pulling it in close to mine, smelling his scent for a brief second before I lost all my senses to the kiss I gently laid on his lips. His strong arms held my sitting waist tightly and securely as he parted his lips, deepening the kiss. A soft moan escaped from my lips and I was sure I heard one come from him as well, but it was quieter so I wasn't entirely sure. Unwillingly, I finally pulled myself away from him, staring into his begging eyes and satisfied him with my smile instead. " That's all I wanted... Now go, before you're really late. " My voice was a whisper but I knew he heard me. He brought his hand up to brush away a stray hair in my face, smiling gently and staring at me with more love than I've seen from him. One last thing before he left, I pulled myself into his strong chest for an embrace, burying my head in the empty hollow beneath his chin. I took this moment to breathe in his scent one last time, letting my senses go crazy one last time and I could tell he did the same as he buried his face in my hair, his soft breathing staggered slightly. He gently combed his fingers through my hair as he reclined away from my head and looked down at me. " I guess... I should leave... Goodbye Aerith. " His voice held slight melancholy to it.

The moment I heard that, I quickly looked up at him, tightening my hold on him. " No... Not goodbye, Cloud... Not yet. " I stared into his eyes. He smiled, nodding as he understood. Very slowly, we both slid out of each other's hold and quickly Cloud stood up again. He stared at me one last time before turning around and leaving for the door. I watched his every move. Once he opened the door, he turned to look at me. " I love you Aerith. " I grinned happily, that was all I could do. Stupid me. He laughed quietly at me, and before I knew it, he had left the room and closed the door behind him. I closed my eyes, listening to his movements carefully. I heard his footsteps down the stairs and finally the creak of the door opening and then the gentle 'click' of the door closing.

I opened my eyes and rushed out of our bed, running quickly to the window that faced the front lawn. I opened the curtains and pushed the windows out, watching as the love of my life slowly walked down the smooth, cobblestone pathway. I smiled at him, waving as he turned around to close the gate. He hoisted himself on his Fenrir, that was parked at the front of our house on the street, and looked at me. I waved again and blew him a soft kiss which he pretended to catch and put safely in his pocket. I giggled to myself at his playfullness and grinned as he gave me a salute, revving his motorcycle to life at the same time. I watched him carefully as he turned away to face the road ahead of him and noisily left the curb of the street, driving off quickly towards wherever he was going. He was gone.

I suddenly felt lonely. I slumped my shoulders and leaned on the windowpane, resting my chin on my hand that I propped on the ledge, looking out to the sky.

Even though Cloud was gone for just a few seconds, it already felt like he was gone for days. I sighed a longing sigh and knew that I missed him already. But I have a feeling that he will come back soon.

I believe in him and I know he will come back home soon.

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**author's notes :** Hello, everyone! Thought I'd do something new and write in first person! I must say it is easier than writing in third-person ... Well, at least to me it is. :)  
Anyways, let's all give a minute to thank Stephanie Meyer and Bella Swan and Edward Cullen for inspiring me to write this story. If it weren't for Bella and Edward's aspiring love, I wouldn't have been half as inspired to write this story. :heart: Yay for those two! But of course, Yay for Cloud and Aerith more:heart: 

I hope you guys like this story as well as Aerith's PoV, I hope I didn't go out of character for the two. Also, I'm terribly sorry that I haven't been uploading many stories, hopefully this makes up for it. _Hopefully.  
anyways._

_trankwility; over and out. _


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